Things have been whirling along a break-neck speed ever since Aleni was born. And really, it's mostly none of her fault, since she is about the easiest baby in the world.
Most days, I stumble off to bed feeling tired to the bone, yet having finished nothing. It seems that the to-do list only gets longer and the minutes get shorter. That the harder we run, the less we accomplish.
I have heard myself whispering (if only to myself) "Once things slow down...." Telling myself this is a soon-ending state of affairs. Somewhat like the mental difference of running a marathon and sprinting 200 meters. One you dig deep and settle into a steady pace that you can hold for a loooong time... and the other you suck in a deep gulp of air and go for it.
Today, I was showering and thinking, "Once things slow down a little--" and then I stopped. An image flashed into my mind of a person I know that often heaves a heavy-hearted and suffering sigh as they mouthed those same words. Over days, months, and years. A lifetime, really. Of not enjoying the present--of looking ever-longingly into a future that never came.
It then hit me: This is the new normal. This is my pace, my stride, my race. I need to wrap my mind around that, get into a rhthym I can sustain for however long it takes--and figure out how to thrive in it.
Now to find that rhthym.
This really reminds me of Jim's sermon on Seasons...we expect our life to be on an upward trend all the time, when in reality, it's a journey of lots of ups and downs and "normal" boring stuff. Like you said, it's the NOW that matters.
ReplyDeleteWe watched Hot Rod with Jess the other night, and I leave you with a quote from that epic film: "Life is pain. You have to scrape the joy from it whenever you have the chance." : )
now i REALLY have to go listen to that sermon... :)
ReplyDeletedon't leeeeave me...! hahah... the "epic film" part.