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Tuesday, January 24, 2012

learnings...

Ok, folks. It's been crazy here internet-wise... and otherwise! Whenever I wasn't too busy running around like a crazy person, our internet connection wasn't working. Then, our computer went down with a virus and it was about 2-3 weeks without internet whatsoever. Now, I know I am due for Aleni's 2nd birthday post... but since our main computer went down with the virus, we had to download all our pictures memory sticks.... and I don't have the time to go through them and find the pictures I want right now.
During this time, I have been working on about 4 posts. The one I am posting today, I probably started around end of November, and it has been interesting to find that other "blog friends" have been doing similar posts.



Everyone seems to say when you hit 30, you just suddenly get it. Life becomes an "oh, I get it"... and things take on a new light. Well, I haven't quite hit that noble age--but have become aware of certain understandings that come to me. And, I wanted to write them down.


1. Life truly lived is messy. I remind myself of that--not only when I am sweeping up the scraps of a fun craft project with the kiddos--but when things don't go according to how they "should" be. I have just noticed that those people with big joy, who have people coming and going at all hours, who are ready to drop or pick up anything at a moment's notice--their lives could be seen as "messy". But, man. Are they really living!

2. You can't escape pain. You can choose your response to it. I think we often feel that we have the right to nurse a hurt or complain about a wrong thing said--but, really. It doesn't help. Pain is often a life-saver.

3. Listen deeper. Ask more questions.

4. Love hurts. Or, it hurts to love. Whichever way. I've often thought about how a rational person could sit back and look at all the heart-pain two people madly in-love with each other go through to make things work... or the late nights parents stay up crying and praying for their child... or the sacrifices made in the name of love... and that person would realize: Life would be a lot easier if I didn't truly love. But, oh. It wouldn't be a life worth living. Because true love is what it's all about.

5. In each season of life, there is always going to be [at least] one thing that is not how you wish it to be. I think if I can just except that, expect that--I can just move on. "Ah, you are that thing that is going to try to make me crazy during this season? Foiled!"

6. Redefine your perfect. And then, redefine it again. And, again.

7. Just stay open. Living with a closed fist does not protect you from harm. But, it does shut you off from a whole lotta good.

8. Smile more and yes, at people you don't know and yes, your big smile.

9. You can't do it all. So just pick that one most-important thing for today, and let the rest go.

10. It's ok to change. In fact, that's the point. I feel that we can often hear a voice in our heads, "Changing is admitting you are wrong." When, in fact--maturity is impossible without change. If you even sit back and look at all the changes an acorn has to go through to become a huge, strong oak... you can see that. And, no one is mocking the "wrong-ness" of the acorn. I think if I see change as a sign that I am doing something right--I am being open and sensitive to God's voice--then it takes away a lot of trying to prove myself more right than someone else, or just b
being scared to change.

11. Uncomfortable never killed nobody. Have you ever noticed that often our discomfort level rises whenever we think about doing something we might want to do--but be afraid of what someone might think... or that we might fail? Ya gotta do that thing. It may be your destiny.

12. Forgiveness is different than trust.

13. Let your loved ones know you believe in their greatness. It can make a huge difference.

14. You can learn something from just about everyone. How to be or not to be.

15. Who you choose as your friend(s) makes a huge difference in life.

16. We all have it way better than we think we have it.

17. Expect your plans not to go as planned. I don't know if this may just apply to me... But, I tend to be a very idealistic person. I dream up this, "Let's take the kids here, and they will love it and it will be great" plan. And then, the car runs out of gas, the place is closed and it's raining. And, then I have a choice. I usually just completely melt into a mushy pile of, "Boohoo. It was going to be so fun". But, if I had put in my mind that realization that "It could go great or it could go horrible" and kind of started playing out different scenarios in my head... Then it helps me to switch to, "Ok, kids. Let's have an awesome time playing in the rain while dad hikes up the road for gas." I have to remember: The point is, life is made up of memories. Memories are made. What kind of memories do I want to make?

18. You don't have to explain or justify yourself to people as much as you think you do. No really. You don't. Either people will agree or disagree. You will have either done the wrong thing or the right thing. Words don't generally change that.

19. People first. Always.

Woulda been cool if I'd have come up with a perfect 20, right? Maybe by the time I turn 30... :)