Saturday, May 29, 2010

Soothes the Savage Beast


I am realizing how big of a connection music has with my heart. Try like a straight shot.

Maybe it's because I don't have a piano to tinker around on anymore. Or maybe because whenever I took out my violin when Noah was a baby, the sound would send him over the edge. Or maybe because now days are filled with "Jack and Jill" or "ABC's"... whatever the reason, I feel like I have lost a big part of my "feelers" because of a divorcing from daily immersion in music.

Recently. I have begun to tap back into this power source. I realized that I never feel closer to God than when I am in a worship service. But, then wondered at my lack of motivation to do daily devotions.

Power solution: I now go to youtube and play whatever worship song pops into my head--in Spanish or English. While it's playing, I get down on my knees and begin a time of prayer... which is all I need to get me more than ready to dive into the depths of God's Word!

I don't know if I'm the only momma who ever feels this (ha ha)... but, recently it has been hard to get my sweaty, spit-upped-on, just-mopped-the-whole-house-and-am-up-to-my-elbows-in-dishwater self into a romantic frame of mind. Don't get me wrong. I love my man. He's the best. But, remember that quivery, overpowering feeling of romance that was there "back in the day"??

I miss that.

So, I am now on youtube creating a playlist called "cantos romanticos". They are all the songs of our first days together. When where we are now was only a dream seperated by thousands of miles and an uncooperative visa office. It was when we were only consumed with thoughts of each other.

My heart is singing.

Thursday, May 27, 2010


Two things that are always hard to adjust to in Mexico--US.

1.) The Toilet Paper Issue.
When I get to the US, I am usually looking for the trash can... and then remembering that I can just flush it. In Mexico, it takes a couple days to "go back to the right way".

2.) Carpet or The Shoe Removal Issue.
I forget how almost all US houses have carpet. Therefore, mostly people pad around in socks or barefoot. I forget that walking around barefoot on my tile floors in dusty Fresnillo usually leaves me depressed at how quickly my feet turn black.

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

I am the mama of a 2-year-old!

Painting and pen scribbles done entirely by Noah. :)

Wow. I can't believe my little guy is two. Sometimes that means it feels like he's been with us only a few days. Other times it means it feels like he's been a part of us forever.
My Noah Rey. My first everything! I love him more than life itself, and am grateful for all he has added to my life. Before I had Noah, I felt like I knew all there was to know about mommying. I had looked down my nose at people who complained during pregnancy (ha! and God taught me a lesson there!)... and had looked down my nose at those people who seemed to stare out from vacant, slightly crazed eyes while standing hunched over in some corner jostling a crying baby. Or those people who kept their babies on this precise schedule. "Hey," I scoffed--internally--"I helped mommy 7 younger siblings. These people ain't got nothing on me. And babies? You just strap 'em on and take 'em anyway. Haven't you ever heard of letting them sleep in the car... or at someone else's house. No need to be so controlled. If you're relaxed, baby will be relaxed too.
Ha, ha. So, God decided I needed a little thing called empathy. And he sent me my bubby. When Noah was born, he laid across my chest and stared up at me with dark, very serious eyes. He never cried, even when they were scrubbing him down and dressing him. We named him Noah-- "man of peace". I was in love. And also very emotionally unstable, thanks to all that "post-birth hormonal stuff".

Noah was pretty much asleep during the first 2 weeks after being born, like all babies. But, once he woke up--it was to a world he did NOT approve of. I just remember days, entire days, of non-stop crying. It seems he is very sensitive to his senses, which translated into: the happiest version of Noah was in a dark, cool, silent place with momma. When I would sneeze, he'd cry for an hour. I recoiled when neighbors gave him the nickname of "El Enojón"--the angry one. However, since Noah would go into never ending screaming sessions when anyone besides me held him, I can kinda see why. Church services would find me walking around in circles in the parking lot with him in my arms. Visits to friend's houses would often be embaressing, since I couldn't "pass him around" and was often unsure as to how Noah would appreciate (or not) a new experience.

I remember saying to Rey in those first 5 months: "Why would anyone have more than one of these??" Although I loved Noah fiercely, he was draining me of every ounce of energy and spontainuity...and I wondered if I had what it took to be a good momma. "I take it back--all those mean, judgemental things I thought!", I moaned to myself.

Around 6 months, Noah began to slowly adjust. Granted, he still only wanted to be home and with me, but the days were illumined with his big smile and sparkly eyes. He began to become stronger physically, more interactive. He is a keenly observant child, which is probably why he was SO aware of where he was and who had him as a newborn. He is very cautious and never over-anxious to jump into things.

I DO remember Noah's first birthday as if it were yesterday. He still hadn't figured out the whole walking thing and was slowly beginning to open up to having friends outside of mom and dad. His birthday party was just the 3 of us and a cinnamon roll... along with some gifts from family and friends. AND, it was the day we found out another little sibling was on the way.

People talk about the terrible 2's. These days, Noah is just so fun to be with. Every day, he is making new connections and thinking of new ways to make me laugh. He learns a new word or two just about every day, and his countless array of faces keep us smiling.

I know this is a long, rambling post... but, hey! It's my blog...and I want to put up some milestones:


WEIGHT: About 27 lbs (according to our scale)

SHOE SIZE: Just started using 7


FAVORITE TOYS: Beary & Blankey, cars, balls, magnetic trains from Uncle Jake & Aunt Hannah, horses, anything musical

FAVORITE MOVIES: Really anything musical.... he likes Veggie Tales, Boz, Blues Clues.


FAVORITE THING TO DO: Get wet, play with animals

DOESN'T LIKE: Getting dirty/sticky. A lot of attention on him when he is in a new situation. Being away from mama.

FAVORITE FOOD: Quesadilla, mac & cheese, bannanas, ramen noodles, grilled cheese sandwhich, fresh corn tortillas (his list of food he doesn't like is muuuuuuuuuuch longer!)

PHYSICAL THINGS: He looooves to dance and sway to music & singing. He can jump with both feet. He can run and kick a soccer ball (of course!). He can throw overhand. He can walk up and down stairs (holding onto something). Goes downs slides alone (the short ones!). Claps. "Plays drums".

ARTISTIC TENDANCIES: He's just figured out that pens are something more than a great thing to chew on... and has been doodling up the town. I think he shows great promise! ;) I also think he is going to be a musician--possibly drums?? Hmmm... a drumming farmer??

WORDS: "Ah-sigh" (outside); "Peas" (please); not to be confused with "Pee-pee" (which usually is poopy); "Bah-bah" (Bottle/drink); "Nigh-Nigh"; "Side" (slide); "Baby"; "Kie-ing, kie-ing" (crying, crying); "DaDDYYY"; "Momma"; "No, no" & "Mm-mm" with a head-shake; "Car"; "Doggy"; "Kitty"; "Ah-see" (horsey); "Cow"; "Seep" (sheep); "Ducky"; "Ball"; "Are ok?" (are you ok?); "....twoooo, dreeeeee!!" (his form of counting); "That say?" (What does that say?); "Hiiii!"; "Bye"; "Hello"; "No touch". "Tickle, tickle;" "Eat!"; "Yite" (light); WOW!; also not to be confused with "Wower" (flower);"Cheese";"Oobie" (movie); "Soft"; "Nice"; "Cooool!"; "Ah-yite!" (alright); "Want that"; "High fie" (high five); "Jump"; "Kick"; "Oh, maaaaan!"; "Yay"; "Ning!" (good morning"); "Tooorrr!" (sure)

He undestands most of what I tell him, and he loves to come and babble on to me very expresively while bobbing his head up and down, raising his eyebrows and putting much inflection into his tone of voice. So cute.

Noah, my boy... I love you for who you are and what you are making me! Thank you for being our number one baby, and for blessing our lives as you have!

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

New Year's.... wishes??

A report on how it's going with this year's New Year's resolutions.

Hmmm..... A note to those wanting to keep resolutions. Don't have a baby on the 10th day of a New Year or spend the last weeks of the first month running around getting paperwork for same baby or leave for 3 months roaming through the US and Mexico at the end of the 2nd month of said year... if you want to keep your resolutions.

So what does that sound like? A wopping excuse. An "it's not really my fault that I haven't kept my resolutions"??


And it sure feels good to be back here, trying to make them happen again.

Here's to a more successful 6 months....

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Family Defined

Our trip through the US these last couple months have given me many things on which to reflect. We met so many people who gave us so many new insights, new experiences and new friendships.

One of the things that seemed to be wherever we went was this idea of family. What really makes a family? Should you only call people who are related to you by blood "aunt", "grandpa" or "sis"? Or are we all related anyways--thanks to Adam...and to Jesus for making us one in Him?

Since I was a teenager I have longed to adopt. I've always seen myself with a large (reasonably large, I should say) ;) diverse family. A family connected by love and diverse in background and ability... but united by the knowledge that they all belonged to each other.

I have come to understand that adoption is not as "beautiful" in Mexico as it is in the US. That is to say, the cultural viewing here seems to be more like, "You adopt when you need an extra servant around the house." Or that the adopted child is inherantly less than the other family members. When I'd try to bring up the adoption issue to Rey, he just couldn't picture it. "I don't want the child to feel less loved, and I don't know if I honestly would love another child as my own."

Rather than loftily telling Rey how "unspiritual" he was, I applauded his honesty and just decided it would have to be something God showed him--and perhaps it wasn't even in God's plan for me. Maybe it was just in my plan for me, which would have desastrous results anyway if I proceeded.

On this trip, I don't know how many families we have interacted with that had either adopted members or member who were just "understood" to be family--even some movies we happened to see on the trip spoke to this issue. One large family in particular had such a diverse makeup that we immediatly were swept into their family. We were made to feel special and loved from the moment we walked in their doors. I truly believe it is because of the unconditional and unqualified love modeled by the parents, that the children then showed that same love to anyone.

That is what I imagined in my mind when I imagined a family made up of not just "blood-children", and I am so grateful that Rey was able to see these beautiful examples of God's love. How God has called us to love all and how God has brought us into His own family regardless of our race, gender or status. How can we not but do the same??

I am not saying we have a direction we are taking at this point. But, I can see that God is opening hearts, and perhaps putting us on a path towards an end I desire.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Here's the truth of the matter...

I'll save you some time. And some money.
It's just that I've stumbled upon that ONE THING that will make you have an awesome marriage. Like a happy, healthy one.
Here goes:
"The key to having a happy, healthy marriage generally just
boils down to me acting like an adult."
Funny how that is.

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Remembering to revel...

Recently, I've realized that I really enjoy being stinky and covered in any combination of slobber, spit-up, snot and tears. Deep down inside.

Ya know why?

Because those are the little badges of mommyhood given to me by my very own munchkins, and even if some days I moan when I see a mirror, I am coming to see that this has it's own very special beauty.

I am so glad I have babies.

Babies keep me humble. Nothing like a temper tantrum in the middle of the store or a baby out of his/her comfort zone to make you think twice before you judge another momma.

Babies keep me accessible. It is incredible how toting a baby on your hip automatically makes people feel they can talk to you more easily. And how it makes ME want to talk to THEM. (What?? An ADULT???)

Babies keep me young. When else could I have a legitimate excuse to clamber through the McDonald's playland or gyrate to a kid's music video? I ask you.

Babies keep me smiling. How can I not? When I look at those big beautiful eye framed by awesomely long lashes. When a roly-poly doll-baby beams her face-splitting grin up at me. When he does something mischievously goofy just to see me smile... how can I not?

Babies keep me full of awe. Really? Truly? All of this personality... beauty... life... come from my own body? This little tyke is the same little 8 pounder that keep me up nights??

Babies teach me what love is. They teach me what it is to dream big for little lives. They teach me that I want to live a better life, so they can have a better example. They teach me to reach out in empathy-- to cry with others, laugh with others.

I can truly say babies are a gift. I can truly say they have changed me forever.

Now, I'm off to change a diaper.

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Points for the Good Guys

Rey's getting better at saying what I want to hear. The proof:

Me: Guess what? I just weighed myself and I weigh as much as I did when I was pregnant.

Rey: How can that be when you look so great??

Yes!! I think I may just keep you around a little longer.