Thursday, August 5, 2010


Isn't it interesting how being with people and having a good time causes one to have a certain "buzz" to them? Like, when you've been with a group of friends and been living it up and then come into a quiet house--don't you notice that you bring a whole energy field with you? The silence seems to crash around you in stark difference to the excited interchanges that you'd just been a part of...

I must say at this time and place, Rey brings a lot more of that energy into the house--meaning: he is rubbing shoulders with "big people" all the time. Many times he comes home with this "smell of people" on him. The lightness of shared jokes, words interchanged and general community.

I must also say that often--when I get that "whiff" of people, I find myself stiffening internally. The correct word may be "resentment". Not in huge, life-altering doses. More like a few drops of resentment, as I more thoroughly feel the weight of not having rubbed shoulders with "big" people; not having exchanged jokes/concerns/hopes/life; not experiencing community. I also find myself wanting to squelch the happy weightlessness of his mood: give him "that" look and sigh as I shuffle off to bed.

Sounds like a healthy solution, right? I know my situation may be a little extreme, but I also know I am not the only momma of babies that struggles with the huge loss of girlfriends, adult conversations and freedoms.

The good thing is I am learning what an energy boost healthy community brings and that it is vital to my health to do whatever it takes to get my weekly (daily?) bucketful of it. Even if it takes humbling myself and asking for help--maybe my chores are keeping me from being able to get out for coffee. Would it be the worst thing to hire someone to help out? Might make my pride cringe a bit--but it would be worth it. Community may take flexibility on my part, it may require me to relax and let the schedule go a little. It may be inconvenient--and even be offensive-- at times. But, it is necessary.

Where do you feel you are on your interaction meter??

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