Of You

Rey graduated as an Industrial Engineer in 2007. However, we have never been able to get the money together to pay for his diploma. This birthday, that was his gift: the money to pay for him to be officially named an Engineer. Below are my thoughts....

This picture is so precious to me because it is the only one I have of Rey as a child.
He is the one on the swing, with 3 of his 8 siblings.
They are Mario (pulling his hair), Fernando and Marina.

Have I told you lately, my love, how incredibly, how immensely
How insanely proud I am of you?

I think about you, about where you came from.
Your vision, your determination.
You saw yourself where you are now.
Happy, fulfilled, accomplished, educated.
You determined never to take the easy way,
Never to complain, never to give up.

You chose to go to school every day you could.
Even if you were a year behind everyone else
Even if you didn't have money for lunch
Even if they laughed at you.

You chose to continue on,
Even when the rest of your family gave up
You set your sights on finishing
Even if that meant studying by candlelight

You finished primary school almost at the top of your class.
Bet that closed those kids' mouths.
You came from behind, you on your own.

You went to college.
Even if it was in a different town.
Even if it did require a combination of walking,
Hitch-hiking and bus-riding.
Every time. In that heat.

You continued on.
Even though it had to be overwhelming.
The homework, the work at home,
The work to pay for school,
The work to get to school.

You graduated, yes. You did.
I cried because I could not be there.
And I cried because I was so proud of you.
Your family cried, too.

And, now, my love.
Here you are. An Engineer at last.
Not only in vision and spirit,
But now on paper, too.

Words fail me.
I could say more, but it wouldn't be enough.
Just know that I am proud. So proud.
Proud of you. Proud to know you.
Proud to be with you.
--Yours.

Rey on his graduation day with his sister Marina.

"You Can't Make Me" .... but I can be persuaded.

I heard about this book from this article. After a long-winded email to my sis about my parenting woes... she replied with that link.

I really loved what the article had to say, and went straight to Amazon to order my copy. :)

Now that I've read the book, I would just say: Go read the article. Slowly. It's a really good, condensed version of what the book had to say.

Things I liked:

The author really stresses that strong-willed children (SWC) aren't trying to make you mad. They are wired differently.

The author is herself strong-willed, so she gives many personal examples of how SWC view the world--specifically black-and-white orders. Really eye-opening, since I am about as far from strong-willed as you can get.

The most important thing you can do is cultivate a relationship of unconditional love with your SWC and find out what motivates them.

She talks about how the SWC can pull a family apart, and how that's the devil's plan. That also opened my eyes and made me want to be more proactive about my parenting, as opposed to reactive.

Things I didn't like so much:

After about the half-way point of the book, she seemed to start repeating herself. I think the book was really written to parents who are about to kick their SWC out of the house in exasperation and her book is to try to help the parents love their child again. Maybe that's why she starts repeating herself. And, maybe it's a good thing I read this book early enough so as not to need the repetition. ;)

Overall:

Good book... the article is just as good.

Ain't Nothin'....

More than once during a day, I find myself saying (even if only internally): "There's nothing like it!"

Here's my list of top unbeatables:

"There's nothing like...."

• "...A hot shower." --Oh, yes. I do say this to myself during every hot shower. Right after the words, "Ahhhh" and "Thank you, Lord." It is luxury, bliss... ok, moving on.
  

• "...A sparkly clean and perfectly organized fridge."-- So why is it so hard for me to motivate myself to stay on top of that?

• "...A bite of dark chocolate late in the afternoon." --No explanation needed.

• "...A massage after a day of lugging babies and who knows what else around." -- Deep breath in, long breath out....

• "...A view of 'my' mountains out my back door." -- Never fails to inspire awe.

• "...A hug from my loves." --Delicious.
  

• "...A cup of smell-good coffee and uninterrupted conversation." -- Does that actually happen these days?

What's on your list? :)

domingo.

To me, there's nothing like walking down the street on a Sunday morning in Mexico. Most men here work 6 days a week, and have Sundays off. The difference of daddies being home is obvious.

It almost feels like everyone takes a deep breath, exhales slowly and completely... and then just enjoys the day. Radios everywhere are turned on, pumping ballads and corridos out onto the streets. The usual traffic of work trucks and men on bikes going to work is stopped. Dads sit out on their front door steps, in sweats with their hair standing up--watching their kids play in the street.

It seems the wind blows softer, the sun shines warmer. Things just slow down. People's faces--usually lined with the urgency of appointments and bread winning--are relaxed. More ready to smile. "Buenos días," is spoken more generously.

And I, walking to our corner store, breathe it in. Smile at the group of boys showing off their marble skills to somebody's dad-in-pajamas. Think about how later on I will be smelling the smell of meat being grilled at many people's houses. And, for the millionth time, tell myself how much I love domingos.