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Saturday, February 20, 2010

Secrets to Successful Brothering




Since Noah has officially won the Nobel Best Brother Award, he has been preparing day and night for his acceptance speech. I found his notes tucked in a corner of his high chair the other day. These are top secret tips on how to be the world's best brother, so you better thank me for giving you the ahead-of-time, insider's look at these. Got to write fast, before he wakes up from his nap and discovers what I'm doing!!




Top Tip #1: Refer to little sis as "eee-eeee" (big boy talk for "baby") in the highest, squeakiest, sweetest voice you can.


Top Tip #2: Learn from mama. If mama calms baby down by going "Shhhh shhhh shhh", then do likewise. It helps to bob as you chant the magic sound.





Top Tip #3: Every morning, after playing a while, look around for baby. If the door to the bedroom is shut, bang on it while chirping "ee-eee" until the door is opened. Make a beeline for the crib and continue talking to baby in this chirpy voice.

Top Tip #4: Baby's other name is "nigh-nigh" ("goodnight").


Top Tip #5: Make sure to check out baby's stuff to see if it's ok. This includes playing with his/her rattle and sucking on his/her pacifier when mama and daddy aren't nearby.


Top Tip #6: Let nothing get between you and your access to baby. If this means learning how to climb up onto mama and daddy's super high bed for the first time, do it. No fear! Press onward.


Top Tip #7: When giving baby kissees, nothing sufices but at least 5 in a row. Less... well, then... you're not the best. Obviously.


Top Tip #8: Saved the best 'till last. This is the number one important one, really. THE JOB of big brother: Whenever baby makes a grunt, squeak or wail, your job is to alert mama. Sort of the Lassie of the family. Run to baby (or as close as possible) and reach out your hand to him/her while looking around for mama and saying "ee-eee" as many times as nessesary to alert the (sluggish/neglectful/not-on-top-of-her-game) mama.

THE END.


And, I must say: He speaks from experience!! I love you, bubby!!

1 comment:

  1. You are blessed to have such a wonderful and loving little boy! :)

    ReplyDelete

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