So, I've been feeling a little guilty about how many movies I have been putting on for Noah during the day. I mean, they're educational and/or Christian--so, come on, right? Oh, I have a list of excuses, including:
--we don't have a yard (we live in a 3rd floor apt)
--I'm pregnant (helloooo)
--Noah's still not at a very "interactive" age (still eats play dough and crayons)
--the house isn't that huge (don't know what I'd do if we still lived in our previous home!)
You get the idea. But, I still kept feeling a little guilty. Picked up the "What to Expect" for the toddler years. Says he should be seeing 30 minutes a day. Whoops. So, have I been brain damaging my son because I'm tired? Heap on the guilt.
Then, Noah had one of "those" days. Those days where I squint my eyes at him and try to remember where I got him. Who is this kid?? Just constantly testing every thing, and then going off the deep end of tantrum land when he was corrected. When he gets like that, I feel like he is looking at me and saying, "Failure!!!" Because, if I was doing everything right--my kid would never act like this, right?
Talked to my sis, who reminded me we can always get better as parents--and to ask myself if I was using the movies as a substitute for time I could/should be spending with Noah.
Talked to my husband, and he counseled me not to shy away from being (what I consider) harsh with Noah if the situation demands it. And if I am feeling overwhelmed, I should ask him to take over.
Result: Have become more intentional with Noah's movie time. Not to say that he never goes over 30 minutes a day... but it has become more of a planned thing rather than a knee-jerk reaction to boredom.
Have tried to discipline Noah in a "this is for your own good" rather than "this reflects on my failings" sort of mind set.
I think that may be betteration. Not sure.
PS--I still worry sometimes. Maybe someday the DIF (people that look out for kids here in Mexico) may come knocking to relieve me of my motherly duties. Like this afternoon: Noah comes in from playing quietly on the patio--with a large, dirt smiley face. (Sorry--wish I had a camera) He looked really funny...until I realized this meant he'd been DRINKING from bunny Mona's water cup. Have you ever heard of anything so disgusting? I considered having him drink hand sanitizer.