Thursday, November 26, 2009

Pregnancy Apologies

So, a few weeks of battling for more than 4 hours of sleep a night and being uncomfortable 24 hours a day has me feeling sorry for the people that have to be around me.

Sorry, Noah.

Sorry that I can't play in the rough-and-tumble way that you like so much. Little sibling makes crawling around, falling to the floor and any kind of bending over really hard. Sometimes, I am moved by how happy even my smallest attempts at playing with you "like we used to" make you. Sorry I can't do that more.

Sorry that you are watching way more movies. The idea of scampering up and down those 30-40 steps overwhelms me at times. I know I should be providing you with much more stimulating ways of playing, but--for now--it's all I got.

Sorry that for reasons you can't control, I am far less patient with you. Sorry if I get really annoyed with your need for interaction and sorry we don't chat as much (sure can't wait 'till our conversations are "two-sided"!).

Sorry, because I know that sometimes you just want to spend time being held and snuggled by mommy, but I get tired faster and sometimes your sibling-on-the-way starts beating me up because you're sitting on her head.

Sorry, Rey.

Sorry that I'm completely useless to the world by 8:30 pm.

Sorry that I'm not much better in the morning.

Sorry that you have to share the bed with about 100 pillows, and that my constant tossing and getting in and out of bed keeps you awake at night, too.

Sorry that I can really only do one thing a day. You are either getting a really clean house with all the laundry done and everything sanitized. Or, you are getting some really yummy eats. Or, you are getting a son who is receiving a lot of attention. Or, you are getting attention. Some day... maybe never...I'll learn how to get a little bit of everything into a day!

Sorry you get to relax less because I can't do as much of my share of things.

Sorry because I can't promised a bettering of the situation for another... oh... 15 years or so.

Sorry, world.

Sorry that you have to watch a somewhat dazed version of myself shuffle around, bumping into things and forgetting my thought half-way through a sentence. Sorry that you have to watch me shift around into the closest thing to a comfortable position... and that you have to avert your eyes as I 1-2-3 heeeeave myself up off the couch and to the bathroom, for the 83rd time today.

These things should clear themselves up in a fairly timely manner. I think. You hope.

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